Reason for Living

Have you ever reached a point in your life where you felt there is no reason for living? Question sounds scary huh? This must have been what's inside a person's head when he's contemplating on ending his life, or when he feels all alone, depressed and lonely, or when his life is all messed up and can't find a way to make it better, or when he's drowning in pain - physically or emotionally.

This thought popped into my head this morning... not that I wanted to end my life or anything - don't read me wrong here. Maybe I just had too much time to myself that I was thinking of so many things. Things I wanted to do with and in my life but just couldn't... miss my family... having no work... insecurities... blah blah blah.

Ok, back to the question/topic... Why would a man think there is no reason for living? Aren't our families reason enough? Or our friends? Or the man we love? I have always wanted to ask people who tried ending there lives why they did it. Is it a mental thing or an emotional disturbance or just plain weakness?

I remember a friend from high school who took her life by hanging herself from the beam of their house. They said it was because of insecurity. It was tragic so to speak, but no one knew the reason. I couldn't say it was because of that - she did good in school, she was athletic, she had lots of friends, her family was well off and I think was a cool family. Why did she do it?

I also know of someone who had tendencies but I never had the guts to ask what triggers them or what's in his mind. I know there are scientific/medical explanations but what I wanted to know is what's on the minds of these people? What makes them do it?

I know I had reached a point where I thought I had no reason for living but then I think of my son and the poeple I love and the thought just slips by... I know I can always think of a reason and there'll always be one. I guess the desire to live is what drives me to move on. I just hope that desire doesn't wear off and if it does.......